One question that sounds simple but deep. Talking about ones spouse is not less simple as to talk about life itself. Talk about life, one talks about it from a perceptive that isn’t deep enough to be exhaustive.Â
Ones spouse is like life, weaved around with so many possiblities .They are like ocean deep enough, wide enough, plenty with water, replete with fishes of all kinds, reptiles of different species and creatures of all forms, finding habitation in it . On it Ships and boats sail through, and get capsized sometimes. They are like ocean, giving many fishes up to be caught and creating yet platforms for people to swim and get drown sometimes.
The choice is always ours and the consequences and benefits ours to bear and enjoy too. Who is your spouse? What are their likes and dislikes? Their love language, chemistry and drive? Who is your spouse? What is it that remains ever green in your mind about them? At all times stiring joy and happiness in you? Is it their looks and shapes that attract you? Such don’t last anyway, they wane and get worn out, wrinkled with time.
Is it their money and fame? No guarantee for such to always be available at all times . Is it their intelligence and academic excellence? In one fell swoop the genius and highly articulated orator may become a vegetable, laying helplessly on a lonely bed of rejection, unconscious of themselves and their environment.
Who is your spouse to you? A sex machine? Satisfying your orgies in a way and manner that make you passionately exhilarating? Or an ATM machine cashing out at will. One day death will come knocking, not two will go at same time, in turns, two of you will go. At that point, who your spouse is and what they mean to you will be clear.
To those whose spouse was seen from the attraction of physique and the admiration of achievement, will without long find solace in a new spouse, moving on and transferring whatever they had and felt for them to that who comes to heal and bring solace.
But those who were soul mates, living beyond the attraction of the physical, to something more intangible, yet deep and real, unbothered by the fame and status achieved, nothing replaces them at death, no space for a new spouse, forever the moments they shared, will be too deep and unfizzled to allow a new entrant. Who is your spouse to you? The later or the former? No marriage is only roses without thorns, and no marriage is only thorns without roses. The two are always there, though in disapproprate proportion. Turning the more thorns into roses and more roses into more thorns lie between the two and their will power to say yes! We can!! Marriage is good to those who are soul mates to their spouses but an agony to those who on account of their spouse are turned into accidental philosophers. Jarlath Opara
Jarlathuche@gmail.com
