Mclaren Artura: The New Wonder from Woking

408 views | Ayodele Ekundayo | April 3, 2021

Last week we established the legacy and potency of McLaren as an automotive technology powerhouse. We talked about some of the time machines they disguised as cars like the legendary F1 and the sinister P1. We also touched on their impressive racing heritage and character line up. If you haven’t read that article, I highly recommend it. Follow this link (https://thenews-chronicle.com/mclaren-the-wonder-in-woking/).

Today, we move! We have looked back long enough, now we must face our front. Respected Kung-fu Master Oogway once said “yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift, thats why its called present”. At McLaren, they recently gifted us a present that unlocks the mystery of the future,  and I must say, if that is the future, then bring it on! Last week, I said that there are no aliens in Woking, and I stand by my claim. However the new McLaren Artura is proof that something paranormal is happening there. My powers of deduction tell me that its time travellers. Yes, I said it; time travellers! And I’ll lay out my case.

Looking at the Artura… in fact let’s start from there. The name ARTURA. From whence cometh such??! McLaren is a British company and the car was designed and built in Britain. The CEO, Mike Flewitt, is British! The Design Director, Robert Melville, is British! Every other car they have built before this one had a logical naming convention. For example, 570GT means 570 PS (Pferderstärke or Metric Horsepower) Grand Tourer; 600LT means 600 PS Long Tail. The top of the range Ultimate Series Cars have names like Senna (to honour Ayrton Senna) and Speedtail (to emphasise its focus on speed). Every name so far has English underpinnings. Then along comes ARTURA. I think someone  from the medieval times when Latin was the dominant language of the elite came up with that name. Somebody more grounded in reality than I am said that the name is a portmanteau of ART and FUTURE with some pizazz sprinkled on top for effect. I’m sticking with my theory.

Secondly, looking at the Artura’s overall appearance, it seems to be more at home on a Ring World like Elysium or at least from a time when such a world has been built. That is to say, they were not playing when they merged art and future in the name. The physique is so well sculpted, it elicits tears of admiration. Why? The car is not designed to be beautiful for beauty’s sake. It is the product of harmonised design and engineering; aerodynamics and advanced material science; wind and structure; force and matter. Every curve has a purpose which it executes most efficiently. This is not the work of high people with pencils. This is scientific, organic and generative. The air is coaxed round, over, under and through the body as if by the hands of an Air Bender. There are hidden ducts near the doors, flying buttresses on the shoulders, vents under the headlights, spoilers and diffusers to manage airflow and keep the car planted at speed. The sunken headlights give it a superhero-esque gaze. The raked silhouette combined with the teardrop roofline and staggered wheel sizes ensure that you and everybody around you knows that this car can warp space-time!

Thirdly, did I mention that its a hybrid?! Power and luxury on a clear conscience! Gimme that any day. There’s a twin turbocharged V6 commanding 585 “ISO Certified” horses working in synergy with an E-Motor contributing another 95 PS. That brings it up to a total of 680 Metric Horsepowerzzzz. Here’s another theory: there’s no production line for this car in our current timeline. I suspect that in McLaren’s office, they have a big Stargate-like time portal. On the other side of the portal is McLaren in 2040. When they build the Artura there, they drive them at full power and through some quantum shenanigans, the cars appear in Woking today. Just think about it. Anyway back to the car, there’s also the option of driving on only electric for 30km. This means that you can sneak in and out of your area without causing a stir and then when you get to the express, you can break everybody’s eardrums. Your local ENT Doctors will like you a lot. And if anybody makes the stupid mistake of trying to chase you, just summon all your electrified horses and see what 720 NM of torque can do. The car is said to be able to accelerate from 0 to 100kmph real quick (3 seconds flat) and on to 200kmph in 8.3 seconds. It tops out at 330kmph. That is 2 and a half hours from Abuja to Lagos with good roads and no traffic and no kidnappers and no police checkpoints. Now that is what is called speed.

Fourthly, the car is so light, almost too light for its power (in my opinion). The car weighs 1498kg ready to go. This gives a power-to-weight ratio of about 488PS/Tonne which is just above the Ferrari 458 Speciale. The car has an 82kg monocoque made from 4 new types of carbon fibre. Other structural and body panels made from superformed aluminium. Even the shape of the exhaust has been straightened to cut weight. So instead of the pipe coming out under the car, since the car is mid engined, the exhaust comes out where the trunk handles would have been on normal cars. It should go without saying: don’t stand or drive directly behind one of these monsters.

In conclusion, this car is touted as the opener of a new chapter in McLaren and the automotive world. And I don’t doubt it. Why? Because when McLaren says that they are bringing the “Full Force of McLaren”, those who know better don’t ask questions, we run straight for the hills and take cover.

Thanks for reading this. Till we meet again next week with another stunning car review, stay fresh.

Recent Comments (2)

  1. Anonymous April 3, 2021 at 10:40 am

    The design is just a dream

  2. Oluwasegun Olajubu Abimbola April 3, 2021 at 12:31 pm

    Give me one of this anytime. *Drooling* The real car to travel . Impressive write up

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