Fatherhood! Beyond being married. Married are many who have children, but poles away from being fathers.
Being fertile and able to put one in a state of motherhood makes no one a father, mad men are are capable too.
Fatherhood is a role, a responsibility, a duty, an emotional connection etc only those with the emotional and social intelligence should be considered fathers!
Fatherhood isn’t “Daddyhood”. Many are Daddies who live in their world, enjoy their comfort zones and never cared how their families are structured and run. They are Daddies because of life circumstance.
Strangers in their homes, their presence hadly felt and their absence never missed. The work very hard though, make the necessary money, provide all the necessary material needs of their families, still far from being fathers.
Very consumed into what spines money for them at the expense of the cohesion and bonding of their families.
For such Daddies, money answereth all things. By mere snap of fingers, whatever needs their children and spouses have are provided.. Mothers are there afterall to take care and bridge the gap, always the thoughts of some men.
Mothers do the shopping, do the school run, attend PTA meetings, school parties, select what the kids wear, watch and play with, a responsibility some fathers are totally strangers to ,nothing to say, nothing to contribute and nothing to influence over.
Their lives growing up is formed around mothers, while fathers go on their social spree, unconcerned of the spiritual and emotional growth and stability of their children.
Fatherhood has been compromised by some men . The values, ethics and morals that should be integral parts are by day dimmed, reflecting nothing on the life and destiny of some of our children.
Some children are what they are today because of parental negligence on the part of fathers, whose influence on their children is nothing but a sham, a shame and shackle of unfortunate tales of woes.
Fatherhood is as delicate if not more than motherhood in the life of children. The two are like wings of a bird. No bird flies effectively well with one wing no matter how beautiful and efficient it is. It takes the functionality of the two wings to fly and soar too.
Sadly, the father’ wing in the life of some children are either weak or totally broken. No child gets by pretty well with one wing of motherhood, either they fly hitting their bodies on the ground for lack of proper balancing or remained immobile without flying.
How many of our children fly well on morals, ethical and spiritual grounds? How many are balanced emotionally to engage the challenges of life without being overwhelmed and swept off by them?
The wing of fatherhood in the life of some children is gone bad. The feathers pulled ,nothing attractive, nothing appealing and nothing worth looking forward to.
To these children,their fathers are neither here no there. They have lived their life so far without father’s positive influence. The ones that have influences, such influences have derailed them the more into a life of woes and regret. That they are standing on morals and values, courtesy of the little strings of mother’s influence.
As fathers we have responsibilities to be at least a mirror to our children where they could go to check how much of values, morals and integrity they can harvest from the image,character, behaviour, attitude etc of their fathers.
You could clad in CMO uniform, attend meetings, contribute to all the projects and activities still not be a father. Such person may be men who are members of Cstholic men’ organisation, afterall CMO means Catholic Men not Fathers Organisation.
One can be a man not a father, never would anyone be a father without being a man..
Where are you? At the level of manhood without fatherly influence or at the level of fatherhood with duties and responsibilities on his spouse and children uncompromised?
The choice is yours! As one makes ones bed,.so shall one lay on it.
Happy father’s day in advance
Jarlath Uche Opara Jarlathuche@gmail.com
