Our societal institutions, which are meant to instill morality and ethical behavior, are failing—or at the very least, not doing enough. The increasing moral decadence, especially among younger generations, is proof of this failure. The way people think, speak, and act today reveals a disturbing shift in values, particularly when it comes to relationships and marriage.
Last year, while traveling for a program, I boarded a commercial vehicle and struck up a conversation with a fellow passenger. We were discussing employment opportunities when she suddenly changed the narrative. She excitedly told me about a young lady who had recently married a wealthy Nigerian man, emphasizing how the lady now drives luxury cars, moves with security personnel, and spends money freely.
Curious, I asked how this related to employment, as I had assumed we were talking about conventional job opportunities. Her response stunned me: “Mr. Danjuma, don’t you know that marriage is now employment?”
I challenged her, asserting that marriage is marriage, not employment. Other passengers in the vehicle supported my stance, but her perspective revealed a troubling reality—many people now view marriage as a financial transaction rather than a sacred institution built on love, companionship, and mutual growth.
This mindset explains why many marriages today are unstable. When people enter marriage as if it were a job—expecting financial benefits without personal commitment—it is no surprise that divorce rates and broken homes are on the rise. Marriage is not a contract for economic survival; it is a lifelong commitment rooted in shared values, love, and mutual effort.
Marriage is about companionship, growth, and unwavering commitment. It should not be a 50/50 partnership where each person contributes only what they feel like. It requires a 110% commitment from both partners, with a mindset of building something greater together.
A marriage built on true partnership means both individuals actively contribute to its success. It is not about waiting to receive benefits but about being intentional in creating a strong and enduring bond.
Entering marriage with unrealistic expectations leads to frustration. Both partners must be self-aware, emotionally intelligent, and sincere about their intentions.
A successful marriage thrives on common values and beliefs. Without alignment in fundamental principles, conflicts arise, and the relationship becomes unsustainable.
Love alone does not sustain a marriage—intentional effort and compassion do. Understanding each other’s needs, making sacrifices, and being empathetic are essential for a thriving relationship.
Success in marriage is not measured by financial gain but by the strength of the bond between two people. It depends on what both individuals invest in the relationship—not just in material terms but in emotional, psychological, and spiritual growth.
Until we correct this growing misconception that marriage is a shortcut to wealth, our society will continue to produce unions that are doomed from the start. Let us return to the true essence of marriage—a union of love, respect, and purpose, not a financial opportunity.
Abu can be reached via danjumaabu3750@gmail.com or +2348062380296
