“Friendship” is a social construct designed by men to lie to themselves.
Most of the time, it feels more like a liability and less like an asset. It demands an immense amount of resources—mentally, physically, psychologically, financially, and emotionally—just to be a “friend,” let alone a “good” one.
To be an enemy is practically easier than to be a friend because you don’t bear the responsibility of feeling anything for your enemy.
But with friends, the very time and strength one should be investing in their own self is rather spent auditing another person’s life: trying to know how they feel, what they feel, and exactly when they feel it.
I am supposed to do routine check-ups and expect them in return. I am meant to suppress my own emotions just to appease yours because you are going through something.
I am supposed to feel joy for you because you are feeling joy, even when I am actually drowning in sadness! I have to force myself into sadness because you are sad, although I am not sad?
It is an exhausting, helpless, tasking cycle that men designed to “be there for each other.” But you cannot truly be a friend if you have to fake your emotions.
True friendship is rare, perhaps entirely non-existent.
—
Chukwukamso A Okoye
Abuja, Nigeria
Chikamsookoye@gmail.com | Mrfocuschikamso@gmail.com
+234 813 644 4218
